Write.

 

Good Afternoon Readers! I hope you all have had a great weekend. Usually Sunday's are my least favorite day. But , today has actually been wonderful. We went to Gracelynn's grave today for a few minutes. I'm excited to report that the footer has been poured!! So, that means that her stone will be set soon. I'll be sure to share pictures and probably a whole post when that happens. I'm sure it will be a emotional day for us all. But a good day too , I think it will help in the grieving aspect of things. 

So, today I thought I would share with you my writing process and some things that I do that really help me cope/grieve. I hope that maybe they can help you! 

Write.

Since I was in school , I have always loved to write. English and History were my favorite subjects. Some of you that know me personally , know that I'm not super emotional ( well, I didn't used to be ) For me, writing has been therapeutic on some level. More so now than ever before. It's relaxing to me , Give me a pen, paper and quiet..I'm in my happy place. As a mom in general and person too I guess. Sometimes you forget you're a person sometimes as a mom. It's all about those tiny humans you created most of the time. Sometimes ..being a mom is hard. It's overwhelming to say the least. You are responsible for keeping these kids alive . making sure they are happy and healthy, constantly worrying if you're doing it right and wondering if you will screw this up. I mean , it's our job to protect them and try to raise them to be good people. It's hard. 

I've suffered from anxiety most of my adult life. It got worse once I became a mom. After having Cole , I developed postpartum depression . It's no joke. I was so irritable , depressed and just felt down all the time. It's an awful feeling. Depression in general is a battle many people fight every single day. It's sad that so many people go without help , medication and support . I have come face to face with yet another battle of anxiety and depression again since losing Gracelynn. Some days are better than others , on the really bad days is when I write the most. 

I have a journal , I write in it at lease once a day. Sometimes I write down things I need to remember to add to my blog. I write letters to Gracelynn. I write letters to Harper and Cole. I write about what I'm feeling . I don't think , I just write. I'm sure if someone tried to read it , they would be lost. It's a way that I can express my feelings. Sometimes it helps me understand them. No one else looks at it , it is a safe place for me. Most of the time , I write about things that I just can't say out loud. 

Pick up a piece of paper. Pick up a pen. Write something. It could be a quote you love , a memory , a thought or a sentence. It doesn't have to be pages of perfectly written paragraphs . It just needs to be from your heart. Don't overthink it. I can't tell you how much this has helped me. It may help you too. This is something I recommend for anyone. You don't have to be going through tragedy to express what you feel. I write about things that make me happy too. Then when I'm having a bad day or feel down , I can look at it and know that it will get better again. 

When I write my blog posts , I just type. I don't write up a draft. I literally sit on my front porch , think and type. That's why I jump around a lot. I do not plan out my posts.  Sorry if this drives you crazy , but I want to share my life and our story with you . It's raw , sad , messy and joyful. I can't write a perfect post about that. 

So today I hope you write. I hope you find inspiration . 
" Write hard and clear about what hurts."
-Ernest Hemingway 

Until next time...

Tulips of Pink 

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